Lynette's Chocolate Shaman Blog

Politicians and Pundits are Asses

2010-01-20T04:23:00.000-08:00

Although from the land down under, pretty much says how I feel about politics and those who all they have to say about politic is criticizing instead of providing useful feedback.

What's this label of "exchristian" all about?

2010-01-19T13:04:00.000-08:00

This (link) is a topic that I was talking to Steve about just the other day. Even though I once was on the other side, it still is difficult for me to understand how people can have no concept that their proselytizing/judgement comes across so negatively.

Steve asked me what it was like when I was on the other religious side, and yes, I have to admit, that hook line and sinker I believed that that way I believed was the only way to believe...that there was no other truth than what I'd been taught. I really don't recall being so mean as I see people being, but maybe I'm in denial. At any rate, anyone who is so narrowly focused on what they believe to the point of not even being able to consider that there may be another valid perspective is going to come across as arrogant and pushy, I think even if they are trying to do it nicely.

Since beginning to monitor and read the exchristian.com site, I actually find myself uncomfortable with some of the threads/postings I've been reading. When I first started reading, I found that I could very much identify with the anger there...the anger that I personally would call for myself anger over not so much at the seeming illogical and stupidity of Christian doctrine (although I'd come across that way in talking about it), but at the heart of it, the rejection I feel from people. I think at it's core, it really is about a call for love. And oddly enough, a call for love on the what was for me the other side.

My uncomfortableness from the exchristian.com site stems from the anger in the postings, and the attacking attitude. Sigh. In other words, as much as I (we) feel attacked by Christians, so we appear to aptly attack them back. I totally get the being angry part at a system which lied to us and then easily leaves us by the side of the road, not acknowledging who we really are. On the other hand, the other side is still human, despite how much we may disagree with what we think are their warped beliefs.

As much as we wish we received compassion from them, how willing are we to express compassion back? Not an easy question. I certainly don't feel much compassion at times.

Here's another thing that disturbed me on the exchristian.com site. I found a post by someone who was formerly a Christian, but still believed in "God". And someone responded to this person by asking why he still believed in something not real? The poster was not trying to change anyone's mind, and here someone in his new exchristian community was proselytizing/judging him. Now that bothered me.

I think my ultimate shangrila would be a place where everyone could be who they are and accepted as they are. A place of peace. I really don't have an issue with people being Christian...even if I think it makes no sense, if they somehow get something out of it and it helps them feel better, then more power to them, truly. The tough part is that Christianity believes it has to be telling other people that they need to be Christians. And thus the dilemma. How can you be compassionate when you're being annoyed by people who are trying to shove things up your ass, so to speak.

I should say that I do know some Christians who don't, by the way, and we can truly have relationships, and nice ones, when our religious/spiritual views do not become priority. So, it is possible.

So, again, I find myself in an inbetween state...what I would consider an exchristian, but still, oddly enough, what some would define as some kind of believer. But I still feel a bit like I'm sitting outside both camps. Not all, but a bit. Somewhat of a paradox I think.

The good part about hearing people so angry and attacking on both sides, I think, is that somehow I feel the intensity of my anger diminishing. :)

Well, I never did get around to...

2010-01-17T11:40:00.001-08:00

Doing all the blogging I'd intended to around Belize. So, the rest of the pics are on my Facebook page, and here I am over a year later making another entry. In between, a lifetime more of experiences has happened.

I'm sitting here with the Dallas/Minnesota game on the TV. Steve and I have tried out some paint samples on the walls...living room, kitchen, guest bath...for me, 2 out of 3 passed. We'll probably head out tomorrow to actually buy all the paint. And now, I'm thinking I should be "doing" something more, so I'm going to blog a bit.

I had a wonderful conversation with my friend Lynn this morning. It's our Sunday morning buddy call...a way for us to support each other and provide a sense of accountability to the things we are focusing on in our lives at the moment. For me, I'm considering the book that is imminent to write. I think there are all sorts of personal things going on in my life that will contribute to its content. And when I talk to Lynn, I feel that sense of excitement about it.

I also am more clear that this writing adventure will be more about going with the flow than the normal sort of planning/organizing I would do around a writing project. Now, I still believe I need to plan writing time, and know I'll be doing my normal rewriting; however, I will not be fleshing out the whole story or outlining it prior to writing. There's something about this venture that needs me to step away from my normal mode and just let the flow carry me. When I express it this way, I feel a tremendous amount of peace about it.

This place we have purchased, this space we are now living at, is somehow a metaphor that will carry the story that already exists and need only be penned. I'm curious to read that story as I write.

In general I'm curious about connection with other people, and the difference between that and finding out that all you really need exists within you...there is no need to project neediness externally; nothing external of the self can fulfill the fantasy sense of need we create. It can't fulfill it because the void is a fantasy.

So, in all the excommunications I experience, there is the doorway out into the open space of limitless possibility. What seems like tragedy, is really boundless opportunity.

Monday, Nov 24

2008-12-09T15:19:00.001-08:00

Monday is our first adventure at the Caves Branch lodge (http://www.cavesbranch.com/), the Jungle Trek. Neko is our guide for this day hike. Because we’re the only two who have signed up, the hike is intimate. Neko is in his 30’s and is very knowledgeable about the flora and fauna of the area. The day, in total, is all about a hike, a swim in the river, and lots of stories and spottings of plants, animals, and birds. We learn how trees are identified through their bark, about the different types of palms and how they are used by the locals, and chew on the inside of a Kahun nut, which has a coconut type milk inside. Most creatures are unable to get into the Kahun nut, with the exception of the squirrel, who most agilely drills a hole in the end to get at the good stuff.

We also spot a number of birds...most I can’t remember the names of, but the most spectacular was a pair of spectacled owls, which is rare for the day time as Neko explains. We also see a small lizard, hold a frog, and Steve spots a chameleon on a tree.

Neko tells us a number of stories; my favorite is about the Ceibo tree, which is the sacred tree of the Mayans. They believe that those who die make have to make their way through a series of levels and tests in order to get to “heaven”. The levels start at caves in the earth, go up through the Ceibo’s roots, and then through its branches. However, the way to bypass these levels and tests is to be sacrificed to the gods, so some Mayans volunteered to be sacrificed. I guess not all victims were unwillingly killed.

Nikko also told us the story of why the Jaguar is hard to spot...how the Jaguar meets and challenges a farmer. The farmer says that he wants to chop some wood for his family before the Jaguar eats him, and ends up trapping the Jaguars paws in the split in the wood of a log when he asks him to help remove a stuck axe. When the farmer has the Jaguar trapped and the roles reversed, he threatens to kill the Jaguar unless he promises never to bother human beings. This is why humans rarely see Jaguars in the jungle.

Part of the hike took us through an orange grove at the edge of the jungle. Citrus production is a major business for Belize. Most of their oranges are juiced and the juice sent to the U.S.

Other hike highlights include learning about leaf cutter ants (Neko held up one to my ear, and you could hear it make some chittering noise...kind of unerving). They can be used as stitches on injuries. I also got a chance to ingest some jungle protein in the form of termites. Termite mounds are all over the place. Neko broke a small hole in one, and we licked our fingers and stuck a few on them before eating them. Steve says they taste kind of like carrots. I couldn't decide, but I don't think they taste like mint, like some people say. I also, at Neko's encouragement, licked some termites directly off the mound.

Before our return hike to the lodge, Neko took us to a swimming spot in the river. We hadn’t brought our suits, so we just swam in our underwear. The water was cool and refreshing...but all the little fish swarming around us were funny! They kind of nibble at your skin. Sometimes it tickles, and sometimes it feels like you’ve been pinched.

We have a wonderful time in the evening, where we meet a 30-something couple, Julie and Bobby from California. The evening was spent on rum and coke, beer, and cigars, and some great conversation.

Belize Nov 23 2008

2008-12-09T14:44:00.000-08:00

Sunday

It’s Sunday, and we drove to Atlanta Sat to spend the night with Steve’s brother David, and his wife Rose and son Brian. It’s fun to play auntie to Brian, who is four months old. David drives us to the airport early in the morning, and we begin our journey to Belize via Houston and Continental airlines. It is only as we get on the plane does the reality of the journey begin to become more real. The biggest task on the flight out of Houston into Belize City seems to be figuring out how to correctly fill in the immigration and customs forms. We finally touch ground in Belize in the late morning, noticing how small the airport looks. The terminal is older, and we walk outside the plane to get into it.

Basically, all there is to the airport is the immigration and customs lines...besides a few bathrooms and offices. I’m not sure what Steve and I had expected, except the store where we’d buy cuban cigars was not on the way out. And the airport appeared out in the middle of nowhere...we find out later that it is about 15 miles out of Belize City.

Steve gets a bit ahead of me, and gets snagged by a porter for 2$B a bag, who carried our luggage all of maybe a couple of hundred feet to our ride. On top of that, we paid him double because we were mixed up on our Belizian / US currency translation. (1$ US equals 2$ Belize).

Victor, our driver from Caves Branch, picks us up, and drives us to the lodge. On the way, we stopped at a place named Mis Amigos for lunch, and had a traditional meal of red beans and rice and chicken, and Steve had his first beer, a Belikan Stout. Victor was very nice, and answered lots of questions we had on the drive. The scenery on the way was a world apart from the States...from our relative perspective, a poor country. Belize has a population of 300,000 total...many Spanish and Mayan descent.

Caves Branch is tucked away in the jungle at the bottom of the local Maya mountain range. When we arrived, we saw the beginnings of a welcome center that is being built, in addition to a pool at what is now the kitchen. We sat on the Veranda that is the dining area, and were given the run down on Caves Branch, meal times, etc, and were introduced to our room, a “tree house” built on the side of a hill overlooking the river. It’s a two-level room, with a spacious bathroom and king bed on the upper level, and a bunk bed, futon, and sitting area below surrounded by a screen porch. After we settled in, we came down for our complementary rum punch, beer, and dinner.

Dinner at Caves Branch is served family style, and there’s a variety to choose from. We met mostly other visiting Americans form Colorado, PA, the first night, and settled on wanting a jungle walk the next day.

I’m not sure why, but there were a number of things we felt a bit annoyed over and unprepared for...like no electric outlets in the living quarters. We understood the reasoning and the way power is done here, but wished we been prepared for it ahead of time. This seems to turn out as a theme as the days wear on here, and I suspect, at least for myself, a little introspection might not be a bad idea.

Asheville

2008-11-10T14:18:00.000-08:00

It's fall in Asheville...but a little closer to winter. Peak color has passed, and a chilly wind blows through the mountains. I'm glad we're here though. We just spent a wonderful past couple of evenings with John and his Aunt Carol. And, it looks like we may end up going to the Bronx to visit Carol someday in the near future.

Steve let Salem out while he was out for a few minutes...and what did Salem come running to the door with??? A dead mole! There's no way he caught that thing by himself...little scavenger! Lol.

An eventful day. ;) Work, the cat, saying goodbye to new friends, talking with Tiffany. A good day indeed.

Thinking

2008-06-18T15:26:00.000-07:00

I have to say, my mac is fun, especially when i can make pictures like this. Well, i'm feeling tired today...brain drain I think. i have so much going on. between work, getting ready to leave for Asheville, and all the other daily stuff. So, right now, I'm not thinking about a whole lot. LOL!

Steve has just asked me if i want to go look inside the trailer we bought...a 16-ft one...to help us move to Asheville. I think I'll go do.

Our latest big purchase...

2008-02-05T13:24:00.000-08:00

And not made out of a fun space. Here in Texas, air conditioning is vital (I guess we could get used to it, like the pioneers...but they didn't live in stifling condos with no good air circulation). I'm not sure when it happened, but I noticed yesterday, when I turned on the AC, that the living room wasn't getting any cooler. With fans, it stayed at a muggy 81 degrees. I hoped that it might just need new freon, but the friendly AC service guy, David, broke the bad news...old and shot. (By the way, he got along famously with Crystal, our Ball Python...really took a liking to her her).

We wheeled and dealed and then laid out the big dough for a new unit. At least it will save us around 33% in energy bills...this is much more efficient than our previous dinosaur. I don't have a picture of the old one, but this one is at the very least 1/3 larger, and I think more. It makes our neighbor's AC unit look small.

I guess I can now say..."ours is bigger than yours!"

So, here's a few more shots of what we just spent a big chunk of money on...

Torrefazione

2008-01-25T17:06:00.000-08:00

Coffee...and not Starbucks.

When I lived in WA state, and I had to save a buck when I bought my lattes, I frequented those wonderful mom and pop drive through coffee places rather than Starbucks. It was at one of those that I was introduced to Torrefazione coffee. It definitely has a different taste than Starbucks...I would call it a richer, smokier taste, but smooth.

Well it crossed my mind to look around and see if I could find some, and it wasn't all that easy. Not just sold in my local grocery store. I finally found some on the internet, and it came today. It's good stuff...as I remembered it. So cheers to real Italian coffee.

A kitty sort of miracle

2008-01-16T14:27:00.000-08:00

For those of you who don't know, we have three cats: Amelia (calico, 10 years old), Salem (black, 6 years old), and Yuki (seal point mix, 4 years old). Amelia and Salem have always gotten along, but Yuki, the youngest and one big cat, has wanted to be the dominant cat since day one. He can tend to bully the other cats at times, in particular, Amelia. She generally warns him off all of the time.

Well, to my surprise today, a kitty sort of miracle occured. To my surprise, I captured the following:

Now, if that wasn't enough, my rather large Yuki managed to accomplish something more, as seen in the second photo. Hard to believe that not only were they all squished into one little pet bed, but Yuki decided to groom Salem as well.

Made me happy to see such a cozy sight!

Between Christmas and New Years in San Antonio

2008-01-05T17:37:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to share a recent photo of Steven and I during our visit in San Antonio. This is the second time that we've gone for a weekend, and just spent the entire time walking, sitting, and enjoying together time on the Riverwalk. The weather, though a bit cold at times, was marvelous.

Some of the best times with Steven, I think, are those times we've gone away and made time like this. We left the laptops at home, and didn't pay too much attention to the cell phones either. Simple, but the best times of our lives.

Finally, a new post and a new life in 2008

2008-01-03T16:03:00.001-08:00

Can't believe it's been so long since I last blogged. I've been busy with so many things, is my excuse. :)

It's a new year, and we are up to lots. Steve is working in Pittsburgh on a Lotus Notes development project, but is home for the holidays. He's headed back soon, but may be finished with the contract and come home as early as the end of January.

The girls are doing well...Tiffany is headed back to college...Atlanta campus of the Savannah College of Art and Design, while Shelby is busy with her Jr year of High School.

As for me, I'm starting a new job with a contractor, TCAssociates, as an IT Communications Specialist for the Veteran's Administration. I'm pretty excited about it all.

Generally, life is pretty good. The holidays were spent with friends and the kids, and Steve and I spent a weekend in San Antonio sitting around the Riverwalk. The most fun was spent at a cigar and martini bar called Swig. We taste tested brandys and scotches. I've never done that before!

So, a short post, but at least I'm back for the time being! I'll try and post some more photos in the near future.

As far as anything introspective about life...I find myself not worrying so much about things as I used to. This makes life so much easier and less stressful. I think it is related to living life more in the moment.

Welcome, 2008!!!

A Look Back to May 11

2007-05-20T12:04:00.000-07:00

Before travelling to Minneapolis for the STC conference, I spent a week in D.C. working. On Thursday evening, I met with Kathy Kidd at the new Peace Alliance Office (HR 808 Department of Peace and Nonviolence) in D.C. Having arrived a bit early for our dinner appointment, Kathy put me to work in the office. I believe this is the beginning of a trend for everytime I go to D.C., and one that I'm excited about.

After working at the Peace Alliance Office, Kathy and I went to a Malaysian restaurant for dinner. That's one wonderful thing about big cities...there are all sorts of interesting places to eat, and this one was no exception. Now, I'm not given to photographing what I eat, but the dessert that Kathy and I decided to share was the most original work of art I've ever tasted, and I had to take this to show the folks at home. These are creme puffs shaped like swans and filled with vanilla ice cream. They float on a lake of swirling sauces amonst fresh berries. As you can see by Kathy's smile, we very much enjoyed our cultural experience!

On Friday, May 11, (the morning after relishing the swans), Steven and I took part in the Peace wants a Piece of the Pie campaign, taking pies to our Congress members either thanking them for their support or asking them to support the Peace Department legislation currently in the House. I met Kathy and a crew of others at the Capitol, where I delivered a pie and information to Honorable Rep Nick Lampson's office. I have no pictures from that visit, but back home in Texas, Steve, his son Jonathan, and Jim delivered pies and visited Nick's two other offices in Sugar Land and Clear Lake. Here's the handsome trio meeting with Nick's communication director.

STC Conference 2007

2007-05-20T11:54:00.000-07:00

Well, the Society for Technical Communicators conference was great! I can't believe the wealth of information I encountered, and how much I learned in my certificate class for content management. It was a whirlwind, from morning to late at night. And despite the fact that I was in class all day long on Mother's Day, I came back to my room to find these....roses from my sweetheart! I and two new friends, Wendy and Carol, also walked to a very classy Italian restaurant, Bella Note, for dinner. All in all, a great Mother's Day, and I'll be bringing lots of new information into my knowledge base about my profession.

Here's my new friend, Carol, from Carol. She works for Yahoo, and we very much hit it off. I'm very much looking forward to spending more time together in the future.

If this is how it starts...

2007-05-12T05:52:00.000-07:00

I arrived in Minneapolis yesterday for the annual Society of Technical Communicators conference, and here's my room at the Hilton. It's great! I'm on the 19th floor. If this start is an indicator of how good the conference will be, then I'm happy. I'll be taking courses all day today and tomorrow in content management, then be part of the conference activity from Sun-Wed. Here's my brainy experience for the month...besides work. :)

Air Force Memorial Visit - Virginia

2007-05-12T05:46:00.000-07:00

This last trip to D.C. for work, I spent Tuesday evening with Amy. She lives within walking distance of the new Air Force Memorial. Here are just a few of the shots I took. It was a wonderful walk...the weather was great! We also had Thai food for dinner near the metro. There's a great view of D.C. from the memorial, including the Pentagon (the side effected by Sept 11).

Peace Wants a Piece of the Pie

2007-04-21T09:09:00.000-07:00

Steven and I are also involved with the Peace Alliance, an organization which is campaigning for the establishment of a Department of Peace and NonViolence. This is not about stopping the war in Iraq...it is about proactively and in a positive manner treating the roots of violence in our country. I think this is what was most appealing to me...that we look for solutions that address the desperation people feel.

Desperation is fuel for violence...the shooter at Virginia Tech felt helpless. The shooter at NASA's Johnson Space Center was about to get fired and felt desperate and hopeless. (By the way, when I worked at JSC, Dave Beverly, the man who was killed, was part of the safety world that I took part in). The Department of Peace bill is focused very much on addressing the root causes of domestic violence, here in our country, besides looking for international solutions to preempt war as a first option. It's about preventative medicine...we address what brings about desperation and hopelessness to prevent violence. It's about looking at things that make people feel hopeless...like poverty, powerlessness, etc.

We are part of the Peace Alliance's campaign called, "Peace wants a piece of the pie." We'll be taking pies to our representatives close to Mother's Day and letting them know more about the Department of Peace Bill, HR 808. Take a look and see if you're interested in getting involved. Did you know that Mother's Day was originally associated with Mothers who did not want their children to die in war?

http://www.thepeacealliance.org/content/view/297/36/

Non Violent Communication

2007-04-21T09:05:00.000-07:00

Steven and I are studying a technique called non-violent communication that is absolutely astonishing in its practicality and we believe, in its ability to change our personal and larger worlds.

What is Nonviolent Communication?

Imagine connecting with the human spirit, in each person, in any situation.

Imagine interacting with others in a way that allows everyone's needs to be equally valued.

Imagine creating organizations and life-serving systems responsive to our needs and the needs of our environment.

Nonviolent Communication (NVC) helps connect us with what is alive in ourselves and in others moment-to-moment, with what we or others could do to make life more wonderful, and with an awareness of what gets in the way of natural giving and receiving.

NVC language strengthens our ability to inspire compassion from others and respond compassionately to others and ourselves.
NVC guides us to reframe how we express ourselves, how we hear others and resolve conflicts by focusing our consciousness on what we are observing, feeling, needing, and requesting.

Nonviolent Communication language: It awakens empathy and honesty, and is sometimes described as “the language of the heart.”

Here's where you can find out more about NVC.

http://www.cnvc.org/

2007-04-21T09:02:00.000-07:00

Some of Steve's misting landed on the dove, and the way the light sparkled on the drops was pretty. Here's a few of my favorites.

Salem

2007-04-21T09:01:00.000-07:00

And here's Salem. Our gregarious black Kitty. Not picture is Amelia, our shy calico.

Yuki on the porch

2007-04-21T08:59:00.000-07:00

We have three cats...two of the in particular like their time outside on the porch. Here's Yuki (Japanese for "snow")

Porch gardening

2007-04-21T08:57:00.000-07:00

Here's our porch gardening adventure...we have our garden in a spot of potted plants. The first picture is rosemary, enjoying a refreshing mist from Steven.

2007-04-21T08:54:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, we got our first glimpse of the one baby dove. It's really amazing, that we can be so close and see this happen! Happy Birthday, baby dove.

Just before...

2007-04-21T08:52:00.000-07:00

Here is our dove family just before the new baby arrives

Einstein's religion

2007-04-09T09:51:00.000-07:00

I found the following quote in an email from a friend, and found it intriguing. Thought I'd share it as food for thought...

Einstein’s religion, as he often explained it himself, was an attitude of cosmic awe and wonder and a devout humility before the harmony of nature. Einstein wrote in 1932--“I cannot imagine a God who rewards and punishes the objects of his creation; whose purposes are modeled after our own—a God in short who is but a reflection of human frailty. It is enough for me to contemplate the mystery of conscious life perpetuating itself through all eternity, to reflect upon the marvelous structure of the universe which we can dimly perceive and try humbly to comprehend even an infinitesimal part of the intelligence manifested in Nature.”

A night at T-bone Tom's

2007-04-04T14:38:00.000-07:00

Lynn and Tom

Steve and Lynette

Enjoying the outside atmosphere at T-Bone Tom's...
No, this is not this Tom's restaurant

This past Sunday on April fools (although we are no fools), we went out with some friends of ours. There's nothing like having friends whom you can completely be yourself with, and Tom and Lynn rate as that rare breed that are just so. Kindred spirits. I love our conversations. They are neither limited in scope nor in honesty, and that's what I like best. We also have similar tastes...good barbecue and live music. Here in Texas we have both, and sometimes we have them in outdoor, patio-style restaurants. Now, in the summer, the only way to tolerate this (think sun and sweat) is through drinking ice cold beer. Well, you can see the beer on the table, but this time it was a chosen pleasure versus a necessity. The weather was absolutely mild and perfect...great spring weather. We talked about all sorts of things that were meaningful to all of us..about who we are, what we believe, what we hope for. And in the background, a nice loud band rounded out the fun, every once in a while with an oldie that we'd sing to. I'm very grateful for times like this, and look forward to more.

Cheers, to great friends!!!!

The life of a techical writer...

2007-03-30T16:59:00.000-07:00

for NASA. Nowadays, I live, eat, and breath space exploration...from 9-5 so to speak. Here's some of what I have to know...all about NASA's new launch vehicles. And this is just a small piece of the pie. Right now, I'm writing about the whole exploration story. Not just about launch vehicles. At least there will be a multi-page glossy published that I can say I wrote and edited the majority of that will be distributed to Congress and the American public. I think it will be longer than my poetry chapbook. Very cool. For once, I'll be able to say that more than a few people read my writings. Of course, my name won't be on it. So you won't even know I did it. I'll have to bask in unknown glory.

Return of the Dove

2007-03-30T16:45:00.000-07:00

Do you see the hanging creeping charlie to Steve's left? Last year, a pair of mourning doves decided to make a next there and rear two little offspring. Well guess what...see that planter directly over Steve's head? It is teeming with mint...

and in the center of it...you guessed it...

there's Mama

I guess we're going to have babies to watch this year. And this time, we won't have to climb on a chair to see it happening. We can watch over them from the comfort of our metal porch chairs. I'll keep you updated on the story as it unfolds.

2007-03-25T07:47:00.000-07:00

Pow Wow in Alvin

2007-03-25T07:43:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a first for both Steven and I. Not too far from us, the Cherokee Cultural Society of Houston held its Spring Inter-tribal Powwow at Alvin Community College in Alvin Texas. Neither of us has eve been to a powwow before, and I think we both felt like we had a great time.

First of all, the weather was again, cooperating, which always isn't a given in South Texas. The skies were overcast, the temperatures pleasant, and this has nothing to do with the weather, but the spot we picked on the ground had no fire ant mounds! This was of particular importance because we'd not brought blankets nor chairs to sit...so we just sat straight on the ground.

I convinced Steven that we really needed to try some fry bread, which he'd never had before. My last taste of frybread I remember from a road trip back when I was in college, when a friend and I were driving back from college (Oklahoma to California) at the end of a school year. On that trip, we read a paper while we were staying in a very dingy, cheap hotel in Phoenix one night that said the best Navaho tacos were made in a small cafe in Tuba City, Arizona. So, we took the countries roads to Tuba City, making a big loop out of our way. It was worth it! The food and adventure were marvelous. At that time in my life, I'd not done too many spontaneous things like that side trip, and although it may seem small, at the time, I think it was an inspiration for the future for me.

And so, we had indian tacos and frybread, frybread with shredded chicken and bison. Besides the food, we also bought a flute from Standing Eagles flutes...a high C walnut. It has beautiful sound.

Mostly, it was just enjoyable to sit, relax, watch the dancers, and partake in the event. I thanked Steve for bringing me (as he's the one who found out about it). Every new experience is a gift, and in retrospect, I'm always grateful for the many different things I've been able to experience in my life. This was one of them.

Spring camping in Texas

2007-03-21T07:24:00.000-07:00

Steven and I went to Stephen F Austin State park with Eric's Shaman apprenticeship class this past weekend and had a marvelous time. Not only was the weather wonderful (this is the best time in Texas to camp...in the 70's, no rain!), but the company and time was great as well.

I don't know about you, but I know that I've experienced lots of retreats over the years, and quite honestly, they are not necessarily all that peaceful. I think that mostly has to do with the internal chattering I've experienced...the kind of chattering that leads me to think that I don't fit in with everyone. Or, on another level, I'm trying so hard to change and/or be spiritual that I end up stressed out and disappointed.

Well, this time I can say that none of these were the case. I felt so relaxed, and not pressured internally to perform or be other than what I am. I had a great time with other people as well.
Eric said that this is close to what he calls living in a state of bliss, and that makes sense to me. To me, it didn't feel like being on a big emotional high, rather just being in a state of peace and relaxation...knowing that everything was as it should be. It's kind of difficult to put into words, I think. At any rate, it was great!

It was fun to share time with people, enjoy the process of putting up and taking down the tent without feeling it was a chore, making my doll project without being too concerned about doing it just right. Very cool.

A shot of the spring green in the trees.

Callie's dog Ziggy, who went on a walk with Steven and me.

The Last Snow (so many hope)

2007-03-08T05:01:00.000-08:00

It's really not that bad, but it is snow, and my understanding is that snow in D.C. is really not the most common experience. The fact is, however small the snow amount, it really seems to put a snag in things...like traffic and the metro. At any rate, the last snow/cold event took place a month ago when I was here. Between then and now, I've heard that it's been fairly nice. And in the cubicle next door, my manager just let us all know that next week it will be in the mid-60's. If that leads you to any assumptions about the correlation between my visits and the weather, you are not alone. I've already received the blaming eye, as if the power of the weather goddess resides in me...or I'm an unlucky cold charm, despite the fact that I live in one of the hottest, steamiest, and most sultry mosquito-ladden spots in the country.

At any rate, I thought I'd share my pictures of the last snow I'll probably see this season...and the last of the Marriot Hotel I've been staying at (see picture of snow dusted car). It seems that the redheaded stepchild policy has extended to the great Marriot Hotel chain. Contractors will no longer receive government rates. I have to find a hotel elsewhere when I come into town. I don't like western civilization and the concept of corporations, who are not about people and only about profit, which is a very vaporous thing in an of itself. It comes and go and does not add long-term meaning.

I'm going home today, and am looking forward to it. I haven't gotten sick and tired of travelling every month yet, which is a good thing. I'm hoping that the weather will be better here in the next few months so when I come I will spend the evenings on the mall. I've never seen the cherry blossoms and hope to catch that sight as well.

The Red-Headed Stepchild

2007-03-07T11:57:00.000-08:00

It's been a year since I first started this new government job, and a year later, I've yet to see the makings of a government computer to do my job. Rather, I continue working on the contractor laptop, which does the job...but whenever some new government IT directive comes out...process, software, etc...I'm left out in the cold. And to try to get one of these illusive things called a computer to do my job with all the latest and greatest(???) that the government has to offer?

I guess the real story begins with a pact with the devil...the center where I work says "yes, we'll hire her, but only if her seat (that's where she officially parks her behind) is at another center." Guess what. It's not parked anywhere else at home, and occasionally trips to other locations.

It seems that both centers don't have room for me. I'm unclaimed by my illustrious employer...their redheaded stepchild. Government red tape. I'm seeing red!!!!

That's work today. Irony. It's not all that bad, but working is such a strange thing at times. I'm betting that many people feel that way. I'm ok where I'm at, but what I'd really like to do is work that I'm passionate about and believe in. Ok, I've put it out there! Come to me...or show me the map to you!

Other than that, the last snow of the season (at least that's what everyone is hoping here) drifts unseasonably from the sky, a silent crystalline drizzle. Tonight I'll pack, make my way back to Houston, to leave the venerable monuments of the Capitol behind tomorrow.

Newsies

2007-03-05T07:52:00.000-08:00

The Newsies (Disney movie) was the theme for Shelby's recent winter guard competition this past Friday. And of course, as a proud Mom, I was glad to watch! Just wanted to share some pictures.

My Guy

2007-02-14T07:11:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine's, Baby!

I am one of the luckiest women in the world, I think, to be spending my life with you.

SLY,
Lynette

Art Competition

2007-02-11T08:40:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I went to Tiffany's art competition. By the pictures, can't you tell...isn't she terrific? I think any mother would think such of their son and daughter. I so enjoyed going and spending time with her. She received the highest rating she could have after an interview with the judges. I'm still waiting to hear whether her piece was chosen to take to the State competition.

The Two Questions of Nonviolent Communication

2007-02-09T12:47:00.000-08:00

I'm reading a book now that was part of the materials provided to participants at the Peace Conference called "Speak Peace in a World of Conflict: What You Say Next Will Change Your World." (author Marshall B. Rosenberg)

I like the quote at the beginning of the first chapter...Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and then go and do that. because what the world needs is people who have come alive. Harold Whitman

The first thing that struck me about this chapter is what it had to say about what asking How are you? really is about. In essence, the author says this is really asking, What is alive in you (me, us)?

Rosenberg says that we say this as a social ritual, but it's an important question because...if we're to live in peace and harmony, if we're to enjoy contributing to each other's well-being, we need to know what's alive in each other.

The second question is...What can we do to make life more wonderful (What can I do to make life more wonderful for you? What can you do to make lie more wonderful for me?)

I could relate, actually feel the emotion behind the question, what is alive in me? I know I get excited when others share something they care about. If we all could be more clear about what this is, and honor it in each other...the world would be a happier place, I think.

At any rate, what I've read so far is enlightening and practical...an easy but good read for about anyone who wants to find more peaceful and happy means to relate to themselves and others.

Other than that, I'm so glad to be home. Of course, it is cool here in Houston...I arrived just in time. At least it's not freezing. I feel settled at the moment...thoughtful. It was nice to be part of that daily ritual where Steve brings me a cup of coffee in the morning. And I'm glad it's Friday!!!

Waiting for the cherry blossoms

2007-02-07T12:10:00.000-08:00

It snowed here in D.C. last night. Fortunately for me, my commute was to walk across the street to the hotel to NASA HQ. So I can truly say that I thought the weather was beautiful and not a hassle at all.

I can't say I have any particularly deep thoughts today...mostly, after being gone almost a week from home, I am anxious to return to my sweetheart. After the intensity of the past weekend at the Peace Conference, I spent last evening talking to Steve and watching American Idol, of all things...and House. Would you say that those two programs have a balancing effect? And then, tonight, it will be lost. I think I'd sightsee some more, but then I would have to say that the weather is an encumbrance...it's so cold!!!!

I'll just wait for the cherry blossoms in the spring.

The Department of Peace Conference

2007-02-06T12:50:00.000-08:00

Getting ready for our visits on the hill...

After our visit with Nick Lampson's Aide

This past weekend proved to be one of the most amazing weekends I've ever had. The long and short of it is that I stumbled upon the Peace Alliance, an organization which is lobbying to have a Department of Peace created...a department with a cabinet level position that would advise the President and Congress on conflict resolution both internationally and nationally. This department would especially mobilize the diverse conflict resolution resources our country has to work at the root level of violence and create a better and more secure homeland. There's so much information I could share it would take me a long time to do it here.

What I really want to say here, though, is I've never been part of a group of people so committed to service, who are intelligent, grounded, and rooted in deep intention and spirituality. This group follows in the steps of people like Ghandi and Martin Luther King. This weekend moved me so much that I will be giving my time and energy to it. I truly believe that a Department of Peace birthed from such intent...spirituality integrated with reason and practicality, may be able to start turning the tide in our world.

I also realized over this weekend that there ARE politicians who think like the people...their constitutents, and that we live in an amazing country where, when we as the people put our minds and hearts to it, can initiate incredible institutional shapeshifts.

Check it out: http://www.thepeacealliance.org

I'll be sharing more about this for sure, as I plan to become involved at home in this endeavor.

Wind up Friday

2007-02-02T05:25:00.000-08:00

Most weeks, I'm chomping at the bit by Friday...the week has wound down into "me" time. The weekend. I think today is a reverse Friday...a ramp up day.

Already, I had a call from my oldest daughter, who is spending the weekend in Savannah to visit the college she'll be attending in the fall. She's doing this trip all by herself. She's nervous, lonely, and brave...I'm proud of her. I'm glad she calls too. As a Mom, I like knowing she's safe. And of course, I love to hear how things are going.

As for me, I'm ready to embark on another journey. I'm mixing my business trip with pleasure/education. I'll be leaving this afternoon for D.C., and will be working from Mon-Thurs. Over the weekend, however, I'll be attending the Peace Alliance conference in Arlington, VA. The Peace Alliance is pushing to have a Department of Peace established and worked into law. For more info: www.thepeacealliance.org.

Every Thursday night, Steven and I attend a Shaman Apprenticeship Class here in Houston. For more info about the teacher and his work, I highly recommend his book , Journeys to Bliss Healing Stories from a Modern Day Shaman (ISBN 0-0727657-3-5), by Eric Davis.

In the class we learn healing techniques, as well as learning about who we are as people within this context. Respectfully working with energy requires a sense of awareness that is also developed within our learning. I've seen some changes in myself over the year that we've been involved. Generally, I've been a happier person. Specifically, in the past year I've seen myself in a beneficial manner change my perspective on difficult events, get a new job, and I finally came out with a clear gynelogical exam after a 1 1/2 years of working through varying levels of dysplasia. I've also lost some weight (and intend to lose more).

What I've understood in recent years, and this is a progressive understanding, is that the world is as you dream it. We create our heavens and hells...we are not victims of our circumstance.

I have seriously thought in recent months whether I could do the sort of healing work that Eric has. I've wondered if it is really just an ability that only some people have. I asked about this again in class last night, and the response was that everyone can do this. It's about if you believe you can. It got me thinking again. It's not really about whether I can do this work or not...it's more about whether I want to and believe I can. I'm guessing this applies across the board to many things.

When work is fun

2007-02-01T06:14:00.000-08:00

Tommorow I'm heading back up to D.C. for another scheduled trip. I've been told that the intial high feeling of adventure of work travel eventually wears off, and I think that after a year, that is somewhat the case. The part that has not diminished, however, is the connection I feel with those that I work with. Leading a rather solitary existence because I mostly work at home when I'm not in D.C., working in the office is a refreshing experience. What makes it better are those that I work with. Nothing...NOTHING can replace having good co-workers. It says in the Bible that love covers many wrongs. In the work world that translates into...good co-workers cover many difficult work situations. The people I work with now help make my job, and I'm thankful for them.

Intent for the day: "Maintain an Attitude of Allowing: In an attitude of allowing, all resistance in the form of thoughts of negativity or doubt are replaced with simply knowing that you and your Source are one and the same."

Christmas in January

2007-01-31T07:53:00.000-08:00

Divorce is a strange thing. It's outcome is not predictable, at least in my experience, particularly when you have children.

My children don't live with me. That is an entirely other blog entry that will come up someday. Circumstances are never cut and dried, and if you are outside a circumstance...any circumstance that is not your own, I think its best to wait and hear the story rather than come up with your own and your own assumptions about it. I'm particularly sensitive to this, being on the side of societal assumptions which are likely largely incorrect in my case. I hope that it makes me more prone to asking good questions, listening, and being accepting of people for who they are and where they are at.

At any rate, my children have the large responsibility of choosing when they will spend time with me. At the time they were given this option, it was that or at losing them for the longer term.

Needless to say, I don't see them often. They are teenagers, are growing up, and amonst other things, lead busy lives. I understand that. When I do see them, I want to say that most times it is a bittersweet experience. On the one hand, they are wonderful girls...talented, productive, mostly happy. I love seeing that! I'm very proud of them and enjoy their company.

On the other hand, when each of these infrequent visits end, I tend to feel sad...the loss associated with being such a small part of their lives. I'll never get back the time I missed with them because they don't live with me. I don't think that the hurt around that will ever totally go away...there were things that could have happened that would have mitigated this, but those were not in my control. You can't control others.

I think what helps is what one of my teachers taught me...to look within the circumstances and find the good in them. This helps.

I think I got off track here...my youngest came to visit yesterday. She didn't come to our family Christmas, and I hadn't seen her since November, I think. The visit was good, but way too short. She'll be staying with her friends while her Dad goes out of town. I feel so out of the loop...I'm left out most of the time, like there is no Mom in the picture. That's another part of the sadness. I'm last on the list of priorities, and her Dad runs the family as if I barely exist. I rarely hear anything from him, including emergency phone numbers. Sigh.

So, the challenge, the intent for the day (or a lifetime) is to transform this too. :)

Feel Abundant

2007-01-30T05:51:00.000-08:00

"Feeling abundant surpasses the money in your bank account and transcends what others may think of you. Genuinely feeing abundant and successful is possible when you detach yourself from the things you desire and allow them to flow to you - and through you."

What is in the moment is that which is most real. Sometimes I'm caught up in the "grass is greener" syndrome. There must be something better...I could be doing something more significant in my life than what I'm doing now...why can't I be like that "other" person. Steve and I were talking about this yesterday... I think the reality is that each of us has exactly the skills, abilities, resources we need for our specific purpose. The grass is as green as its going to get on our own side of the fence, because it's what is best for us.

One of our teachers has us on occasion look in a mirror and say this to ourselves over and over again...

I am somebody special
I am somebody very special
I am somebody very special right now

Right now.

It's Tuesday, and Monday workday for me. Another day. My intent is to live in the moment and find the best in it today.

Steve made me a wonderful cup of coffee...I had a conversation with one of managers that reminded me what a great manager he is...

Things are as they should be...right now

Walk in the park

2007-01-29T19:03:00.000-08:00

Today Steven and I took a walk in Challenger Park in Friendswood. It was between that and seeing a movie, and the place where I was at, a walk in the park was the best idea. There's something soothing about being outside when the mind is in a whirl...talking and connecting, walking, bird-watching, taking pictures. It's amazing how beautiful a puddle can be, like this one.

Today for me was an excercise in making a choice that transformed a mood. By the time we drove to the park, I was restless, agitated, and generally not in a peaceful place. By the time we were done walking, I'd found a more centered place...I'd worked through some of my thoughts with a very patient listener...Steven, and I let go of those thoughts enough to enjoy the moment.

Intent: What I'd like to do with this blog is share more of who I am. I'm so used to censoring, keeping myself in check. I hope I can learn to be a bit more free in my sharing, in addition to honoring others and who they are.

Blogging

2007-01-29T09:46:00.000-08:00

I've decided to try blogging on a more regular basis, and see how it goes.

One of my practices for the new year was to more consciously put out my intent, in hopes of learning about creating more of what I want for my life. I'm curious to see how putting out my intent through this blog might be part of this.

I'm using a set of cards...The Power of Intention by Dr. Wayne Dyer...as part of my inspiration. Today's card says..."Act as if...what you intend to manifest in life is already a reality. Eliminate thoughts of conditions, limitations, or the possibility of it not manifesting. If left undisturbed in your mind and in the mind of intention simultaneously, it will germinate into reality in the physical world."

It's Monday, and it's my intention to start a new blog. Which I have...